running for life

Well, this weekend had its ups and downs. I just started to get back into the groove of working out. My lungs are almost back to their norm after the pneumonia. I went running around a track at my kids school, and ran for an entire 20 minutes without stopping which is 10 more then I have ever done before. I felt amazing and tired afterwards. It is such an amazing feeling to me, because I have never been a runner nor had any desire to go run before. But now it is all I want to do!!
But the weekend was a bust food wise. I threw a surprise going away party for a dear friend of mine. The food that we served was delicious and so bad for me. And the worst part, we had leftovers. I did not eat a great dinner tonight. I also had like 10 margarita cupcakes this weekend. Shame. I gained back the only 2 lbs I have been losing lately. I cannot get past 132 lbs. I am hovering between 132 and 134. It sucks and is discouraging. I think I am in that rut, and I am going to have to up my game to get out of it and lose the remaining 7-9 lbs left.
But as I was going through my DVDs to try and find the case for the DVDs I found Hip Hop Abs, level 2 and that excited me. So for the past 2 days I have done that work out, which was a killer and I felt it afterward. And to add to it today I did zumba flat abs with weights...so I felt like I did a decent work out.
Tomorrow I think I will go run and then do another work out in the afternoon, since I will be staying home and just focusing on cleaning.
I am also so very excited because I just ordered the zumba exhilarate DVDs and I cannot wait until I get it, so I can do some intense training. My goal is to really get on it, and then eventually take a zumba class to become an instructor. Then my job can be to work out and get fit!
Starting tomorrow I am going to really watch what I eat, when I eat and how much I eat. I am nursing less (Calebs choice) and so I need to make sure I am balancing it more now. And I think I will try to get in two solid work outs a day...even if one of those 2 work outs are only 20 minutes long.
On family vacation, I also plan to super charge my work outs. Running at the beach and doing my DVDs at the same time.
I am just excited that I have my lungs back, and the endurance I have missed. But most importantly I am beyond glad that I have gotten my motivation and excitement to work out/run back! I have missed it.

Getting back in the groove

Well after getting on the scale and seeing my numbers increase and my goal get further behind, I decided I have to up the anty. I have a 5k to train for and a whopping 9 lbs to reach my goal. I know I can do this. I have done it in the past, and I have already come so far. It is a bit frustrating though, to have done so much work and realize that I am falling back. I know it is because of what I ate this weekend, not working out on Monday and using Labor day as an excuse. I have to stop making excuses, and stop over eating and choosing the wrong things. 

I went to the store today and spent more money then I should have, but I got a lot of fresh products to snack on. I am going to turn this family around...I need to for me and for us. I do not want my kids to grow up and be unhealthy. I also do not want them to grow up and think being skinny is everything. There is such a delicate balance. 

I am excited though, because I can feel my lungs are starting to finally heal. After doing Zumba tonight, which after I got sick became challenging, was a bit on the easy side. Sure I worked up a sweat, and sure my heart was racing but it felt too easy. This is encouraging because now maybe I can go for a run and not die in the process because my lungs just could not hack it. 

After I finally reach my goal weight, it will be all about toning. Toning, toning, toning. After having my son, I am unhappy with how my stomach looks. Apparently having 4 kids can destroy it!! I would do it all over again, just to have my kids. But, it is frustrating. 

I know my thoughts are all over the place tonight. I am upset with myself for the weekend binge and weight gain, but also so happy that my lungs are getting stronger again. And it is late and I am exhausted. I am going to head to bed soon, so I can wake up and do a work out before I start my day. But first, I must wash some dishes, since my dishwasher decided to bite the dust tonight. 

Today I realized just how much the pneumonia has affected me. The family and I went for a hike this afternoon, and by the end of it my chest was hurting. I felt like my lungs were going to explode. It was not a long hike, but did have a bunch hills that made it a bit tougher of a walk.

I am disappointed with myself and the progress I have made. And I have not been eating the best these days. Yesterday I ate way too much, and today I ate Long John Silvers which of course everything is fried. So I am sure I already ate well over my caloric intake. I need to get back in to eating healthier. Next weeks grocery shopping will be focused on good foods, and back to recipes for dinner.

I think what really got to me was when I went for a run yesterday. I barely made it through the run, where as before I was able to breeze right through it. I need to pick up the pace and really push myself. I need to make sure I pick healthier options. Tomorrow I will be going to a birthday party and I have to really try not to indulge on the food.

I know this is all very random, I am just trying to wrap my brain around how to get back on track. I also need to understand that one bad meal does not have to equal a bad day. I can just try harder for the next meal, the next work out.

Here are the pictures I promised I would post. One was taken at around 160 lbs back in May. And the next pictures were taken just a few days ago at 132 lbs.